Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Finally getting some use out of those Wedding Gifts.

There is one thing that is guaranteed when you get married: you will receive a bunch of personalized, weird shit. Some of these things are useful and some are so far from useful that you wonder what your great aunt was on when she bought it. I heard people say things like, "Well they're so unique, I wanted to get them something unique and fun". This is a mistake. There are are only a few rules that I feel should be followed in gift-giving. Any gift should be appreciated but these rules do exist.

1. Give gift receipts when possible.
2.. Never get someone something to decorate their home unless you have been in the home and can select something that fits with the decor they have already chosen.
3. Sex acts as gifts are almost always inappropriate.

That's it. Simple enough.

Unfortunately we received many "unique" gifts, all without gift receipts that now sit in a box in our attic waiting for the day when I need to be reminded of my wedding date in 6 different colors of monogrammed blankets.

We received several canvas "art pieces" that I can only assume we are supposed to hang above our beds to remind us of our love. They include our names, wedding date and in some cases inspirational words of love.
I have been on quite a tear decorating the house lately and came across a box of gifts that included the above gem. With my spray paint in hand, I took to the back yard determined to make this canvas into something I could hang in my house. A few coats later, I was pleased to hang this on my wall.

The second canvas pictured was a beautiful Rogers family monogram. Now I just need to find a use for the three Bibles we received and Uncle Tom's coupon for two sensual massages.

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